The chemicals impregnated in the body suit that I was wearing were dripping into my system. I knew that I was becoming weaker by the day. I had heard Abigail warned that soon her baby doll would have to go away for a few days, but when she returned she would be a real baby doll. Abigail was so excited and held me so tight, rocking me in her arms. The feeling of helplessness was intense. My existence of being fed, winded, nappy changed, bathed and dressed was totally controlled by the girl that owned the doll, and I was the doll.Some days she would get up and forget her doll. The cot that I slept in was in her bedroom. She would find something else to amuse her and sometime during the day her mother would change my nappy and feed me and put me back in the cot. I could tell that her mother had sympathy for me but the happiness of the daughter she had always wanted was the most important thing in her life. I spent hours in the cot, no longer feeling like a human being but the possession. ‘In Italy, if you’re at a restaurant and don’t eat all of your meal, can you ask them to put it in a box or a dish so that you can take it home? You can in England—though maybe not here,’ I added hastily, attempting to straighten my face as a diner at an adjacent table, a heavily made-up woman in her mid-fifties who had clearly been ear-wigging on our conversation, sent me an incredulous glare. ‘Anyway, that’s what a doggy bag is.’ ‘I see,’ Marco murmured, though I wasn’t at all convinced that he did. ‘Well, if there’s something you would like, I will ask.’ ‘No,’ I assured him, reaching across the table to touch his arm. ‘Really—I’m full. Full to bursting. Thank you. That was a wonderful meal.’ And it had been, much to my relief. My heart had sunk when I read the menu, realising that the dining room menu mirrored the room service menu and deciding that the chef had, in my view, an unhealthy preoccupation with seafood. But Marco, wise to my dietary foibles, had immediately accosted.
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